crazy in the mid night 4.52am

''Crazy in the mid night 4.52am'',As usual i wanted to complain here about my life,life is having a lot of step to walk though,life can be simple and also complicated.For me i am more to complicated,if u ask how complicated am i,i will anwser my life is suck very very the suck,why?you ask me why?i wanted to give up but everytime my mind keep remind myself i got to be strong,but we are juat a human,we still need to rest to get more strong,and no why just because i am not the hero super man,when is the day?if you ask me why.better you ask the god why,no why no reason.The god was playing us such like a game,the god control us and plan for us everything in our life.Hey fucking god,who you think you are?i does't need you help me to plan,thank you so much.that is my life,you hear that?=)

the dream

'The dream',i never sleep since yesterday until this early morning.The reason why i can't sleep is because the same thing i worry about my future.Although i dunno what will be happen on me in the future but i would like to think 'HOW' can i change my life my future?It may just a dream in this moment but if i never think about it,i believe i will never have chance to geting a better life.dunno why the way to the destination is so far away and no matter how fast i trying to run i still can't reach it.i am tired but i keep telling myself that i got to do it,because it;s just my only hope and chances.it's been long time i never wrote blog,i remember i have write a blog lastime about why am i write blog because i felt better after say it out all of my secret and the pain.my health seem worse and worse,but i hope before i getting worse i can do it 'geting better life',so i will stay stronger facing to the sickness and fight with it alone.I BELIEVE MY LUCK WILL BE COMING SOON ONE DAY...WATCH UPS~ =)

what love mean

''what love mean?'',do you really know and understand the meaning of the love.It's mean complicated.I've learned a thing or two about love,it's push and shove,giving and giving in,giving up give,give,give but nothing's given.Three word to describe love is contradictions,constant attraction and distraction love.love hiding behind contraception deception,a radio without reception miscommunication and misconception.Conception of a life too early for light but just ripe for death.the depth of eyes.the windows to souls shattered into tears.love mean of the distance between me and you measured by lies and truths.love mean hurt and tired.i am tired deeply.I hope every things just a dream and it's gone after i wake up.love is a things that we can't guess up.

In the early morning

''In the early morning''i haven't sleep since yerterday.i have a lot question in my mind.i was worrying about my future,my healthy been more worse and worse now.I am still young now but does't mean that i am affraid about the dead,it's because i havent done a lot things yet.I wanted to take care of my mother and wait till my siblings having a sweet home before i go.If i really go in the second,i will like to tell 'you' i missing you all the time,and i know from we are together,in my mind i given myself a promise you ll be the one share my sadness and happyness.I will love you forever and with you no matter what.Everytime when you calling me maybe the way i talk is bad but i am happy when i see ur call.beside that,i was think human life is just simple,a human is waiting to pass the time from a second,minutes,hours and days till the end.every body got the chance to say bye to others to end of thier life.life is just shorten,still waiting for what,do somethings that is proud of urself,such like say i love you to ur lover or even ur parents,its may just a sentence but it will make the person remember you,not need to think,do it right now,still waiting the durian drop?YA!THE LIFE IS SHORTEN as the time u wait for durian drop.if you see this post,go online and hear song ''its too late to apologize''the song describe what i am trying to tell.bye~those is just my question.i have really do it but how about you?=)

pulau perhentian TRIP

''Pulau Perhentian TRIP'',three days two night trip in perhentian with Boon Wenshi Ang Elmer and the most important person MR.NICK.It may use two sentence to describe this trip it's FUN & HAPPYNESS.There may a short time but it will be a good memory in my mind at the corner all the times.Although we never went to REDANG but it still having some fun in others activities.A experiance that i don't even have in the pass,it just like a dream can't believe finaly i do it(swim).I PROUND OF MYSELF.There is always need to say bye in the end too 'too bad'.BUT after that we are going to continue the next trip kota bharu,we having a lot fun on taken picture.WE went to a SLEEPING THAI BUDHA TEMPLE and more...badly is the time to say bye too.3 of us CALL 'BNW' group sing along the song until reach kl.THE TRIP IS END.THANK YOU!~~~ :)

Time Ups

''Time ups'',wow...april now, the time pass too fast.today yesterday i am still a kid,now i am a big boy.Hope myself can be a kid back now,the kindness happyness is kid always have..enjoy to be with kid.when i am a kid i am curious to be a men,now i wanted to be kid back..hope everything just a dream.Freedom means a lot to me,in between the place i've been and where i'm going.When the world was young and warm,so in love and living for everything new.Flash a peace sign take a bow,though we may not know it now,things are never gonna be the sameBut it's much too late for now to be like yesterday and the time is running out and we still have to say Goodbye.

Paint in colour

''Paint in colour''it's meaningful word that i found in some web just now,mean if yourself not started to paint ur life in colours,you will forever in colour of black and white.The world is keep turning round and round in every second.i though that i am mature enough last time but i am not...now i think back i feel childish.Finaly,my wish had done now..finaly that i move out from the house...i am curios about outside lastime but now i feel regret to be here,but no choice...once i choose this way to continue my life mean i got to continue no matter how hard it will be.Last time i think everything is so easy,now i totally give up,i am tired,i miss them my friend my family...NOW,its just started the game to paint up my life in full of colour as the rainbow.Although how hard the way i got to walk ,i still got to walk,i cant let people look down on me,the rules of the game in this world is once u want people look up on you,first you got to look down on others...i lost my way now...i dunno wht should i do in the next...i feel scare to face everything now...how hope the rainbow gain in my life. :(

life is complicated

''Life Is complicated'',when the day i born to this world i know that myself can't regret because it's my life.A human life is much complicated,it can't to describe or explain.Our life is choose by the god as it like.God,i am tired you know that?is my life need to be like that or you are playing me around!This few months have many screen pass though in my mind,dunno why i suddenly think about it,i am trying to forget it i tell myself i am trying and trying but no matter how the screen still repeat repeat refresh it again and again.I miss you...hope you always here all the time to with me,when i need you,you will be here!You as a charger and i am a phone,phone can't without the charger,because the battery can't last longer without charger.As like me,i can't without you...i need you to with me to face everything.This year shall be my bad year,don't feel good a all,too much things happen on me,spm result is out soon,will the god still playing me...i hope not.God,give me last chance although is too late.my parent put too much hope on me,i scare i will make them disapointed again.....i beg you god :(

2009 is end soon!

''2009 is end soon!''this may my last write blog in 2009.time is pass fast and fast,did u guys realize the time is run too much faster!my yesterday is still 2008,but now is 2010 soon.what to say for this year,i hope me and my friends get good result in spm ''ALL THE BEST GUYS''.We will never know what will be happen in the next right?but i really hope no matter how friend remember me,put me in your heart at the corner!i will say thanks...curently i having two more subjek then over my spm!HOW I FEEL?scare,happy,IT'S complicated to describe my feeling now!Quite pressure,in this moments i can't imaging that i still can be here for writen blog..how wonderful it's although monday got ekonomi but i feel nothings!This year let me know what is really true friend,never never know my bestie will say that behind me,he and my 5years memory is gone now!i feel unbelievable but still have to face the true.BYE secondary BYE 2009.......................it's my last sweet seventeen!

Every time

''Every time'',every time i pass by you it's the time i acting.I acting childish it's just because to get attention from you.Hope you can care me a bit,but every time i with you i feel very unhappy nowadays did you know that?you know why i do so much of idiot things?,its just because why,sometimes i just hope you can care me more then ur friend.You know what i feel every time with ur friend and you?I feel strange to with you,i am like a stranger inside there,say badly i feel we have a distance.It a feel that i never feel before,i think we really need have a talk you know?When i trying to start to talk about it,you always say ''i'am tired,i want sleep already,talk tomorrow!!''.That is a sentence that you always say to me,i am scare actually,scare that u will not care of me one day,scare the feeling.i dont want it happen so that i did much idiot things.we starting have argue and you less calling me!can you tell me what was happen and why?izit you dont love me anymore?Can you say everythings clearly.DEAR,i starting feel tired to this game,feel wanted to end this game.HOPE the time can return to the time of beginning that we have start this game. :)

3.10++in the starry mid night

''3.10++in the starry mid night'',feel so stress.tired....need to rest!later on having exam 'bahasa melayu'.i keep on study but i know is no use but just atleast not make myself to feel badly.KNOW?although that the result is not good but i have try my best!in the feel pass months,i have totally give up...give up my future.Suddenly,i feel that i am change not as like last time the KO KHANG KEAT already,i am strong last time!i hope to be cry but NO,i dont aloud that be happen on me!as what people say''guy blooding,no crying''MEDICAL IMAGING,can i really enough the credit to take this?just need 3 credit how come i feel so hard now?As last time i would not feel that, it will be very easy for me!GOD!can u help me?i am affraid!i am really affraid that.if my result is bad,how i going to face everyone my family my friend and others.HOW?I am regret that i am not study hard last time,can the time return but it wont be happen!everythings too late,u say no?but i tell u i will because i am tired now!sorry that anyone who put hope on me! let it be natural ok?result is good or bad jus let the god to help me to comfirm!

My future

''My Future",first i am a kid a 17 years old kid.This year is spm already,this is a chance to make my future my life more better it's because everyone have their own dream.My dream is Fly away from this house this darkness and this much of pressure house,i want to fly to a place that is colorful as the rainbow and there is my new life.This year may is my last year in secondary school with my friends.I remember i having a promise to my friends,i will help them to find a better job after this and we having our own cafe shop ofcourse it's not just only selling cup cake and chocolate ball la.FRIENDS believe me!AS what i always say if u think u can u sure can!FRIENDS,u remember how we going to plan our cafe shop?hahah....''fish leg''.who say 5pi NO FuTURED?

Thanks

''Thanks'',thanks that what u have did to me,did a happy and hope to me,u giving me all that.U let me trust that it will be happen,trust that can get a true love.It was never happen on me even dreaming but u are the one let it be happen on me now!Sometimes i have think that what i really can do for u,Even how much i have do is not enough u have do to me,being here i glad to having this chance to say thanks to u!u are the best in my heart,i enjoy and happy to be with u all the time.You always asking me why i often write blog did u noe why i often write blog nowadays?All because of u,now me already have u.Blog is just a place that let me rest let me feel safety when i need.But now i have u,i feel safety all the time,blog got no use for me now.you are my another choices now,the best choices.Dear,promise me ok?let my life to be with u continue the life let us face everythings,walk togethers.:)

Kedah wedding

'Kedah wedding',25april2009.THE happy trip start from here,me and my family early wake up to the airport in the morning.We are so decided to go kedah,when we reach kedah first place that we go is the pasar that we always go.hahaha,so miss there so much,long time no see.then we go to my cousin house that near by the pasar,cousin want maried already,big girl liao noe to fly liao.Wakaka...everyone oso change face already,all got bf & gf got baby somemore make me jealous,too bad my lover not there with me!:(....i saw puppy in my grandmother house,so cute is toy poodle,small size one!Wakakaka..so miss my popo:( she at upstair,dunno wether she know my cousin maried already mah?hope she saw it....hahah!stop that.Everyone so happy on that day,girl make up guy changing shirt!Finaly we reach the restoran,so hungry!!!In our table all leng zai leng lui,pai seh.I saw my friend there from kl also,so happy fianly got a friend there,and make me suprised also.The next day we go penang shopping and makan a lot food lo,so nice!hahaha,but too bad that its also the last day we ll be there!i ll be back my food my cousin my popo.

passing by

'PASSING BY'that was a so amazing such like a story between me and a girl.Just a passing by memory ,in the world i don't think so much of people same like us...in this timing 4.51am in the mid nite 23 april 2009.In this moment,i am so bored and moody,suddenly a girl was chating with me,and the amazing story start from there.After we chat,i ask her for the friendster and i saw one of her pic i can realize that i saw her before in one of the day last year 2008,that time me and my friends was count town.Suddenly a pretty girl with her family passing by,its maybe the god let me got chance to know her.Her pretty making my eyes keep looking at her,important is she in my MSN list very long time agos,and i never realize it.Somemore i tot the pic that she showing is fake and i keep asking 'ITS THAT U'because she look like so amazing,and i ask her izit she go to time square for countown last year,the place the timing the describe all is corect,so amazing so suddenly,that was like a story in a movie!can u realize?her face look like a angel and having a kind of smile with the face!AND that girl name 'SIEW MEI'.when u got a friend in ur list call siew mei...believe me the picture is really her!she are from malaysia not taiwan,china or even japan people.maybe this passing by memory is a way god want us to meet up,hope the amzing story 'passing by' will continue.

Pressure

'PRESSURE'finaly this year is form5,have to face to spm.Quite much of pressure also!i have been long long time agos never went to school this year,my mum found a lot tuition for me but curently i just got one home teacher for teaching math and ekon.'STUDY'is this important?i think so!but did 'THEY' really know or i should use understand to describe how much of presure i have to face to?its not easy as what you have think..i am just a kid!did u remember that?can just stop force me not to do everythings,i know you are jus worry me,but please can u stop it!i think its much of enough.too much of caring!i apologizes here for saying those. but i am not just face to a things(study) i got to face others more.i know what myself need to do the next,i really really know it.My life such as shudder,the end the winner ll be me!thanks for support!when i need u,u ll always beside me all the time.

Respect the relationship

'Respect the relationship' just learn it from some one else!A true relationship does't easy to get it or catch it!when u have it u does't care it,that was human life just such as step by step until the relationship is end,you regret you sad or others but this is all did by ur own self.u have found a love in the million of people even that is not ur 'true' love but it atleast a person that u have really love before,the short moments even unhappy or happy after a long time it will be a sweet memory.In human heart everyone have a lock and caring a key to found thier own key and a lock that really suitable for ur key!i think everyone should hear a fairy tales story before,'cinderella'.A story that we really need to learn from them!A girl who name cinderella really find his own key and the love,the true love 'the prince'.Every story have the started and the ending!The relationship that we have now or in the feture it may a short moments a forever but if u have did a wrong step,the realationship will be disappear ir ur life!Respect the relationship when u have if not u will be regret in the feture!:)

without you

''without you''So happy to be with u dear,we already together for few days!i wrote this blog hope that our 'STORY' will start from here and forever can continue it!thanks dear that what you give to me,ur caring and loving!Happy to with u that night,maybe it ll be a normal night but for me is a good memory night.I ll forever remember that night with you!Finaly i found it my 'true love',thanks the god to giving me this birthday present!its my best present in my life!i hope our LOVE will be end but its end until that day we have dead.Can we did it?can we did a FAIRY TALES story?and the character in the story is me & you.My life now was cant alive without you,you are my life now!In the feture we will having a sweet home and two little puppy,i hope!i will always beside u when u sad & happy.xxx LOVE xxx....MUAKX....

Happy Birthday

'AT SUMMIT RESORT'



''HAPPY BIRTHDAY''mac 9,happy birthday to myself!So happy to celebrate my big big day in this year!FRIEND LOVER PARENTS~help to celebrate...good moments good timing good present good place good romance good cake good suprised & nice memory!I being here to thank all my friend lover parents for helping me to celebrate and ur present!THANK alan to be my driver OUR Chow Kit 1 day trip.It may a short time or simple celebration but its enough me to keep the sweet memory inside my heart a side!So hard to descibe it but thanks that all of u still remember my birthday date expecially who sending birthday wish masage for me...its a long time never get news from U but so happy & suprised to get all of ur masage!Everything so suddenly.THANKS for 'U'STARBUCKS cheese cake make my sakit perut,but happy to being with u!HAHAHA...happy is i get a lot of present!i love it all so much:)missing u dear

February

'February',wah... february already,so fast!hahaha.....this months i think should be a good time for couples bah?wakaka...you know why?'VALENTINES' soon lo.SINGLE don't sad,still got times a lot of single available.Around my friend was prepare about the valentines present n suprised.So jealous them,because i was at home that day:(can't out lo...but NVM la.Although u not beside me that day,but having you is my FOREVER valentines.But ofcouse la must have some suprised for we two olso lo...let me think??XXXXXXXbla bla....privacy no telling!But u look like don't mind about it oh?SORRY lo because of me can't celebrate valentines with u:(but i ll try my best de BELIEVE me,have the chance de..i believe still have second third and more years to celebrate with you!Our LOVE will 'LoooooooooooooooooooNGER' FOREVER....DEAR! i being here wish to told u 'HAPPY VALENTINES' & 'I LOVE YOU'.Even i can't beside u but i promise the next year or next next year ,the day of valentines i will beside you and tolding u i love u,i will sing along the song to u.....'FOREVER LOVE'.